Domestic Nemesis

1) It was SO exciting and fun yesterday (Sunday) to find the rice I cooked on SATURDAY still in the pan on the stove- I had totally forgotten to put it in tupperware things! GROSS (see crabby picture) 2) I found this pink chewing gum on my bike wheel?!* And I was like, where the F did that come from because I don't CHEW gum because of my jaw. It was quite a mystery until I remembered that SingingJ crashed on my hide-a-bed last weekend and I know that little punk was chewing gum before bed because I specifically remember saying, "Aren't you going to throw out your gum?" and he was like, "I'm just going to swallow it." NOT :) What should I do? the gum is still on the tire as we speak, same as it is in the picture. 3) This is a picture of my lunch today, not exactly a disaster, but a pretty piss poor meal if you ask me. Just so you are sure, that is a hard boiled egg, a piece of red pepper, some raw zucchinis, and some pita bread. Yumm :) Not pictu...

I don't have a tea kettle that whistles, so I just boil water on the stove in a pan. However, I always forget that I put the water on there and usually, it boils for like 30 minutes! Wasting both GAS and my WATER! Perhaps this confessional will stop my shameful act! Speaking of going to hell, the Christians (I know they are extreme Christians and not regular Christians) on campus are driving me MAD. It seems like every day they are asking me what Jesus would do. I don't know, I think he'd chill out and have a beer and some sex. I don't want your dumb handouts and I don't want to be called a sinner now stop harassing me! Finally, Uncle J didn't even notice my new hair color! I don't even recognize myself when I look in the mirror. I'll leave it up to my viewers: Before After Hmm... Ms. Non-Sequitur PS. Hob actually posted a funny post. Click here and play the video.

Helpful Household Tip #1 When making your bed, lie in your bed and put the blankets by the pillows. Then re-fluff the sheet, add the blankets on top and you've made your bed without walking around or barely exerting any energy at all! This is best done right before you go to sleep, definitely NOT in the morning. HHT#2 It is not necessary to wash your water glass out every time you use it. Feel free to re-fill it with water for at least a week. THEN you can wash it and chose a different glass so the other glasses don't feel useless. HHT#3 When sweeping, go around all the objects on the floor, nobody looks under the couch anyway, and it lets the dust bunnies procreate! HHT#4 Dusting? What's that? HHT#5 Throw lots of dinner parties! They are really the only good reason for cleaning your house! As shown by the picture below!